Tuesday, April 9, 2013

My Spouse just had a seizure now what?

What to do during a seizure and what not to do.

As you have learned a seizure is where a person’s brain is misfiring the signals correctly causing the person to convulse or have uncontrolled movements with their body. These movements are absolutely uncontrolled and may look like a person rapidly shaking their arms or legs, and in some cases their entire body. When a person has a seizure every muscle in their body tenses like a rock and some roll into almost a fetal position shaking uncontrollably. Many times a seizure will result in loss of consciousness, this may result of a complete collapse or staring into space. Once the person comes to they may have no memory of the event. Fainting spells and excessive fatigue is not uncommon as well as very sleepy. The type of tiredness you would typically get if you took a very strong pain pill or shot. When a person is having a seizure it is not uncommon for odd and even scary sounds to come from the person. Today, I want to go over one of the most important aspects of being married to someone with Epilepsy, What to do during a seizure. Some of you may already know how to react and what to not do, while others of you may really not know about this. I want you all to be aware of these as you never know when this may come in handy. I will also cover some myths about a person having a seizure that needs to be facts.

Let us begin with today’s great post!


What You Should Do if you see someone having a seizure

First, Stay Calm. Trust me I know this one sounds very hard to do and it takes a lot of practice but staying calm means you react the way you should then.

Start Timing the Seizure. You need to know how long the seizure lasts, seconds, minutes, etc. This is very IMPORTANT!

DO NOT try to revive the person or stop the seizure! You are honestly not doing anything but harm when you do this.

Protect the person from injury. If a seizure occurs on a concrete ground, floor, or hardwood flooring, don’t just stand by and let the person bang their head against the floor that will cause more complications. Jump down there, put their head in between your lap, put pillows down, blankets, anything soft but the hard floor.

Turn the person on their side! This is VERY IMPORTANT! Turning the person on their side allows for the saliva and other fluids to drain out as the person has no control of their mouth or throat during a seizure they cannot swallow this. Turning the person on their side as quickly as possible allows their air passages to stay open!

Rare occasions. If the seizure seems to last more than 5 minutes or is followed by another seizure seek medical help immediately.

After the seizure. Do not yell, scream, or be frightened the person that just had the seizure will pick up on this immediately and that can cause another seizure. Be calm, talk to them gently, let them know they are okay, reassure them as much as possible. This helps to bring them back.

As questions that you know the answer to such as: Do you know where you are? What day is it? What Month is it? Do you know your SS#? Your Phone Number?

These questions help you to immediately gauge the after affects of the seizure.



  • A person will NOT swallow their tongue if they are on their back.
  • You should force something into the mouth when someone is having a seizure. NEVER!
  • You should use restraints or hold the person down while they are having a seizure. NO!
  • Epilepsy is NOT contagious.
  • Seizures alone does not mean the person is disabled. Unless it is Severe Seizures.
  • Epilepsy is a curable disease. No!
  • Epilepsy is Rare. Again, No!
  • You cannot die from a seizure. Yes, a person can it is rare but I will touch this in a moment.


Now as you can see there are many myths out there about Epilepsy and I hope this has cleared it up. I want to touch briefly on the last one as I stated I would. As with any medical condition like heart disease, Epilepsy can become fatal! Now I don’t want you to worry yourself sick over this one, please don’t its not my intentions here. Those that have seizures and become fatal have a very severe form of Epilepsy. Not every person has this type of Epilepsy known as Epilepticus.


Some background information now.

They say your first year of marriage is the worst and I honestly believe it now. In 2006, we had to deal with multiple seizures very uncontrolled, a miscarriage, my grand father passing away, his family disowning him because he fell in love with me, and many changes. By the end of 2006 Buddy’s seizures were slowly dissipating and I finally started feeling better. Up into 2007 Buddy went for 8 months without a grand-mal seizure. (A grand-mal seizure is where you shake your entire body and it can be really bad on the memory afterwards). Late One Night, Buddy had a major seizure again. I typically never freak out, but with it being so long it was a shock. I had to hold in my fear, tears, and trimmers, long enough to do my job. I flipped him on his side, made sure he could not hit his head, and timed the seizure. It seemed to never end. The constant need to comfort him aroused within me and I was once again back to the caregiver I had been for so long. His seizure did last a few minutes a quite unusual time frame for his seizures to last but, I wrote it off as him not having a seizure in so long. A few nights nothing happened then seizures more and more frequently started popping up. I realized that it was fast becoming a frequent ordeal again. More trips to the Emergency Room, sleepless nights, and more. Finally, I found a Neurologist that agreed to see him. Surprisingly the problem with all of this had been his Depakote level dropped too low. Once they upped his medications back to no seizures and a happy life.

I will tell you from personal experience, that those moments when your spouse or loved one has a seizure it is very difficult even excruciating to keep your fear under control. You want to scream, cry, curl into a ball, and more because at that moment your absolutely helpless. Nothing you do will make the situation better, nothing you say will take away the rest of the pain, nothing can be done to make you feel better and it is those moments of not being in control and knowing the outcome that terrify you the most. At that moment your faced with doubt, fear, worry, and frightened moments. No matter what you try to do those feelings are always there.

I will tell you it does get easier as the years go by as you learn how to cope but, when you are first beginning you are going to feel every type of feeling and afterward your going to feel guilty for feeling that away. Its honestly how it works. I think really the hardest aspects to deal with are the after affects. Memory loss, frustration, tiredness, and aggravation because they have no idea what just happened or why they cannot remember something important. In those moments the only thing you can do is be there for them, tell them you love them, and support them. Help guide them into a better tomorrow and let them know your not going anywhere.

Honestly, cowards walk away when things get tough and believe me taking the cowards way may seem easy and the best solution but, marriage is not easy and never will be. Love is always complicated, never pure and simple, but love is something worth fighting for. Love is a precious gift given to us that should be cherished and protected forever. If you really love someone you will stick by them no matter what happens. I know I love Buddy, and I know that love means trying times, hard moments, exhausting laughs, and memories to cherish for a lifetime. I also, know that means I take him as he is with Epilepsy or without. His medical condition does not define who he is or our marriage, it simply makes things more trying. I love him with all my heart and no matter what will be there for him.

Remember, when your struggling, tired, and ready to walk away that life is no better outside of the relationship. Remember that he/she loves you but cannot help what was given to them. Most of all Remember You Are Not Alone in this I know exactly how you feel.

Until we meet again my wonderful readers. Remember hitting the Follow this blog button to your left allows you to receive updates every time we post a new comment.


  1. Thank you for the tips--my brother had a stroke several years ago and every now and then has seizures. Following you back via GFC. Thanks for sharing.

    1. You are very welcomed dear. I hope this helps not only people suffering from this but family and strangers. You never know when you might need this information. :D